Judge Joel T. Lazarus is a crooked, biased, and incompetent judge who must be removed from the bench at all costs. Joel T. Lazarus ironically touts his brush with cancer, however, Judge Joel T. Lazarus is a cancer. | Judge Lazarus’ actions are against the law, and represent a serious threat to our nation’s judicial process. As an unelected, unconstitutional, and illegal judge, Joel T. Lazarus is in the pocket of big business and pro-foreclosure, anti-American moneyed interests. | Worst of all, Judge Joel T. Lazarus is a fool. A buffoon who cannot form a legal opinion to save his life. Joel T. Lazarus should read my advice on how to write a legal opinion clearly: | When I craft legal papers, I do the following: | – Write ONLY in active voice. | – Eliminate non-identity to-be verbs (be, being (gerund), am, is, are, was, were). | – Order the phrases and words in every sentence like this: | – Subject | – Verb | – Object | – Amplifying phrases. | – Limit sentences to 15 or 20 words. | – Write numbered items in sequences of more than two items, and sometimes with two, to make a point. | – Limit paragraphs to thought modules of three or fewer sentences, and absolute no more than five sentences. | – Check spelling. | – Go back and read sentences for clarity and for obedience to the above rules, and correct them accordingly. | I do this because I don’t want my legal writing to make readers falter and wonder what I meant; I want the reader to focus on my arguments and meanings, not my lack of literacy; I don’t want the reader, particularly the judge, to doubt my arguments because he sees my sloppy writing as an indication of irrational thinking, sloppy or deficient legal research, disrespect for the reader in general and the judge in particular; I don’t want others in the “movement” to see me as an arrogant bumpkin who disrespects the one thing most attorneys learn in college and law school – how to write coherent thoughts accurately, concisely, and in proper English. | Sloppy writing has an even worse effect on the judge than showing up in court ungroomed and in filthy, smelly attire. Why? Because it undoes all of your clients’ good grooming and manners. They can appear dressed to the nines, and speak with dignity and respect, only to have the judge see the legal writing as hurried, sloppy, careless, and disrespectful. And it gives pro se litigants a worse reputation. | I have told many parties I represent, including lawyers and legal writers to omit passive voice and non-identity to-be verbs. They ignore me, of course, partly out of habit, but also out of ignorance. They don’t seem willing to admit that their writing could have far greater verve and accuracy, and come more alive in active voice. You can write better than they by heeding my counsel in this matter.
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